I ruined my skin

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I ruined my skin

PostPosted by Kittee » Fri Jan 23, 2015 3:59 pm

Hello all...I am not here because I have laser damage. I have never had a laser touch my skin. I am here because I had what must have been a sensitivity to a 10% glycolic acid cream. I feel that I don't belong here, but I don't know where else to turn for support. I am grateful to have access to this board.

I don't know how this even happened. I used this cream as directed on the package for a little over a month. My skin was looking very good, until one day out of nowhere I got an indented scar on my cheek. I quit the stuff immediately. In the following days I noticed some huge pores, and then broken blood vessels on my cheeks, and also some discoloration. It has been close to 2 months since I quit the stuff and I still look awful. I feel I have ruined my skin, all in an attempt to improve it. I know my story doesn't compare to some on here who have had far worse problems with lasers, but this has been devastating to me. I feel ugly and I don't feel confident anymore. I went through a lot of panic and anxiety, leading to depression, because I didn't and still don't understand what happened. I have been afraid it will get worse, and I have been afraid it won't get better. I sound vain, but all these changes for the worse came on suddenly and it scared me. I have been taking xanax as I feel I need it. I can't believe I had such a bad experience with something seemingly so innocent, and cannot find anyone else going through the same thing. The closest I can find is people who had problems with strong chemical peels or retin-a (never used either). I am feeling a bit alone and my family thinks I'm nutty. Maybe I thinned my skin out with the stuff. Whatever happened, the damage is done and I am now trying to fix it. Babying my skin, washing with plain water and using as little products as possible. I seriously hate myself for this. I didn't have any scars before this except for a chicken pox scar from forever ago that I didn't care about. Now I feel my face is just a mess. I know I did it to myself. Just need to vent and I feel that I can relate to some of you guys with the psychological impact this has all had on me. Thank you if you read all that...
Kittee
 
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by hopeful19 » Fri Jan 23, 2015 4:24 pm

Kittee I'm so sorry you are going thru this awful experience and regardless of the product or if it was a laser device that harmed you, you do belong, as when something occurs that you didn't expect it is shocking, upsetting and traumatic. I feel the same as you. I was told by adoctor the treatment I had was safe and non-invasive. So when it wasn't, after I trusted and assumed, I was left feeling very alone, confused not knowing what to do to make it better. Have you tried to google the product to see if anyone else has had similar side affects on the internet? I'm sure you have, but it's always good to try the product name along with the words, "recall" or "side affects" etc, words that someone harmed might use to search or post on a site. I know you probably know this, but unfortunately, I just don't know how else to help. I know that there are some other members on this forum that didn't have laser and had a peel or harmed by a product. Hopefully they might read your post or try doing a search "peel" etc on this site at the top to see if you can find some posts specific to you what you are going thru. Well we're all here to support each other, post research and information we find and any positive results we might experience.....so I hope that perhaps in all of our posts you might find some information that can benefit you or at least support to feel better. Welcome, although, sorry for the circumstances that brought you here. :)
"There's almost no risk involved," says Stephen Fanning, CEO of Solta Medical, which owns Fraxel.

The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who do evil, but rather those who sit back & let it happen.
-Einstein
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by Kittee » Fri Jan 23, 2015 6:33 pm

Thank you, Hopeful!! It means a lot to me to have some support. My husband thinks I'm crazy and thinks that I am seeing something that was already there, but I know better. I have read enough threads on here to know that a lot of you guys go through that..family not believing you or taking you seriously. I have done way too much googling in the past couple months...seems like nobody has this reaction to such a low strength acid. What's weird is I had no redness or irritation. Nothing that would make me think I was doing something wrong. Just a random indented scar all of a sudden. I was horrified, because I had never heard of scars just appearing out of nothing. Kind of mad at my skin for not letting me know something was wrong sooner than that! I will check out some of the threads on here about bad reactions to peels. I am praying that some of this damage will resolve itself somehow...I realize this will take time if it ever does. Sigh. My daughter's 4th birthday is tomorrow so I will try my best to enjoy it!
Kittee
 
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by hopeful19 » Fri Jan 23, 2015 8:08 pm

Take a break-vacation from this tonight/tomorrow and really enjoy your daughter's birthday. See the day thru her eyes and make it special for her and you. Stay away from the mirror and just don't focus on it. I'm not familiar with the damage caused by your cream, but keep a positive outlook, that your skin will heal as time continues...also if your mind strays. I hope your daughter has a wonderful birthday!
"There's almost no risk involved," says Stephen Fanning, CEO of Solta Medical, which owns Fraxel.

The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who do evil, but rather those who sit back & let it happen.
-Einstein
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by Kittee » Sun Jan 25, 2015 6:21 pm

Thank you again, Hopeful. I really did enjoy myself yesterday. My daughter had never been to Chuck e Cheese before and she loved playing the games. It was fun watching her play, and I played a few games as well. My husband and I are thinking about going from time to time just for fun.

Ugh, today has been long and boring, and I have too much time to think and stress. I wish I'd either get over my skin or see some kind of improvement. I feel a bit depressed again. Trying to avoid the mirror, I don't always turn the light on when I go to the bathroom so even if I look at the mirror I can't really see anything. I keep thinking I wish I could just sleep for a year and wake up with at least some kind of healing. I don't do well with the waiting game...I'm sure a lot of us feel that way, though. I have an almost 10 month old son who is just starting to try and walk, and I really wish I didn't let the sad state of my skin intrude on this time. Seems I can't help it, though. It's like every day I go through the same anger towards myself, telling myself things didn't have to be like this but I just had to go and put that crap on my face. Well, saying things like that just makes me feel worse. I need to stop because I can't change what already happened. I just need to vent I guess.

By the way, I had contacted electricboom and she emailed me back. I reached out to her because I know she had some of the same issues as me. She told me that her skin healed in time. Last she posted on here she said her scars were still healing, well she wrote to me that they had eventually filled in. Just by being very gentle and not using many products. I am very happy for her, and her story also gives me hope. Well, baby is crying, thanks for listening!
Kittee
 
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by hopeful19 » Sun Jan 25, 2015 8:24 pm

Kittee, I'm so happy to hear your family had such a nice time and your daughter loved her birthday! There is something really enjoyable about seeing the cuteness of a child experience Chucky for the first time!

I'm so glad you got in touch with electricboom and she gave you hope! GO with that! It does seem that you'll see improvement with time. People damaged by creams seem to, although you have to be good to yourself and allow yourself to be patient. It makes it no less traumatic as your going thru it, but there is so much hope for you for improvement. I know that you said it's hard for you not to think about it, but remain positive that your skin will heal. Stay in the moment with your sweet kids...keep up with whatever you need to feel better and not miss out. If it's keeping the light off in the bathroom, perfect. If it's venting here perfect. I'm not an expert, I don't know your cream, but try to remain positive.

Here is a story I just saw today. If this brave woman's skin can heal after what she has been thru, I think it can give us all hope and a dose of inspiration!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... s-ago.html
"There's almost no risk involved," says Stephen Fanning, CEO of Solta Medical, which owns Fraxel.

The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who do evil, but rather those who sit back & let it happen.
-Einstein
hopeful19
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by Kittee » Mon Jan 26, 2015 11:28 am

Feeling depressed and crying today....I am trying so hard to stay positive but it's so hard. I have an appointment with a dermatologist on the 29th. I really don't want to go. I have already been to one and she was no help what so ever. Instead of addressing my concerns with my face (she told me she couldn't treat me because I am too fair, whatever that's supposed to mean), she cut off a mole on my neck. :? Not sure what I am hoping for. I have some weird discoloration near my mouth and am not sure what it is. Not sure if it is some kind of hyperpigmentation or broken capillaries or what. I just can't tell so maybe they can at least tell me what it is so I know what I am dealing with and can make some sense of it all. Also going to ask them what I can do about my break outs, but I fear they may just try to give me retin-a or something that I am afraid to use. I think my break outs are hormonal since they mostly started after I had my kids. I had acne when I was a teenager but it went away and then came back after the kids so...yeah. Stupid acne, I hate it, it's the whole reason I am in this mess. I wouldn't have had the need to use that dumb cream if I didn't have that problem. I HATE IT!!! My acne isn't all that bad but enough that it bothers me, so now I have to deal with that and whatever damage that cream did to me. I can't get a break. I just feel tired of thinking of my skin. I don't want to use make up because I don't want to put much on my skin, but I don't want to go out without it, so now I just kind of avoid going anywhere unless I have to and that probably isn't helping my mood. Also I have lost faith in doctors. I went to my GP and he gave me Lexapro which as a NIGHTMARE. I took a single 10mg dose and it made me feel so weird and like I was going crazy and I didn't sleep for two nights due to some crazy insomnia it gave me. I am considering seeing a psych and begging for some kind of benzos because I know they work for me. I hate the withdrawal from them and how addictive they are but I feel desperate, I can't sit around and cry all day every day. I feel I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. Not to mention my husband hates meds like that but I seriously think I need to do what I need to do whether he approves or not.

I appreciate that story! It helps to have some inspiration when I am feeling a bit hopeless.....reading Cardar's story on here helped too, where she said her skin healed. It's hard for me to look at my face and think that it can get better.
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by hopeful19 » Mon Jan 26, 2015 7:43 pm

Kittee,

Just a thought but do you think it's possible that along with your skin reaction, you might also be suffering from Postpartum Depression, having a ten month old? I know the change in your appearance is enough to trigger how your feeling, but I just did some quick research and found two links (attached below).

If not Postpartum, maybe your reaction to the cream might be connected to Estrogen and progesterone level dropping or thyroid hormone drop? I don't know just trying to help you maybe figure a link to why your skin responded. It might be something to ask the dermatologist on the 29th or your GP.

I also found an article on, "5 Skin Problems After Pregnancy- The horror ...they suggest laser as a treatment for all listed, so not attaching a link, but here was the gist.

Spider Angiomas
What it is: Due to hormonal changes and possibly weight gain, pressure in the veins increases, causing blood vessels in the face to enlarge, leaving a red, spiderlike mark.

Melasma
What it is: Elevated levels of estrogen and progesterone trigger melanocytes, causing dark spots to appear on the skin.

Nonspecific Dermatitis
What it is: Changes in hormones can induce red, flaky patches on the face.

Acne
What it is: Elevated progesterone levels produced by the body to maintain a healthy uterine lining during pregnancy can cause increased secretion from oil glands, sebum buildup, and clogged pores.

(O.k, kittee, just reading those makes me want to cry! :o The good news though is from what I read they're treatable, if that's connected at all to what you're experiencing.)


Here are also two links to PPD.

http://www.babycenter.com/0_postpartum- ... ety_227.bc

http://www.novabirthcenter.com/Birth/Po ... ssion.aspx

Also, there was something called "Postpartum Thyroiditis" that causes dry skin and other issues. Don't think it has anything to do with you but, who knows?, so posting it anyway. I'm not saying anything I just wrote is connected to your skin reaction, as I'm not a doctor/never had a baby, just did some research for you to try and help. Disregard, if it doesn't relate to you.

Postpartum Thyroiditis
What is postpartum thyroiditis?
Postpartum thyroiditis is an inflammation of the thyroid that affects about 4 to 10 percent of women during the first year after giving birth.2 Thyroiditis causes stored thyroid hormone to leak out of the inflamed thyroid gland and raise hormone levels in the blood.
Postpartum thyroiditis is believed to be an autoimmune condition and causes mild hyperthyroidism that usually lasts 1 to 2 months. Many women then develop hypothyroidism lasting 6 to 12 months before the thyroid regains normal function. In some women, the thyroid is too damaged to regain normal function and their hypothyroidism is permanent, requiring lifelong treatment with synthetic thyroid hormone. Postpartum thyroiditis is likely to recur with future pregnancies.
Postpartum thyroiditis often goes undiagnosed because the symptoms are mistaken for postpartum blues—the exhaustion and moodiness that sometimes follow delivery. If symptoms of fatigue and lethargy do not go away within a few months or a woman develops postpartum depression, she should talk with her health care provider. If the hypothyroid symptoms are bothersome, thyroid medication can be given.

Feel better.
"There's almost no risk involved," says Stephen Fanning, CEO of Solta Medical, which owns Fraxel.

The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who do evil, but rather those who sit back & let it happen.
-Einstein
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by Kittee » Mon Jan 26, 2015 9:26 pm

Hopeful,

I have suspected that I may have some ppd. The problem with my skin could have triggered it. I was fine emotionally until then, but I have suspected all along that my hormones were off from pregnancy. I am glad I found this forum because when I started having my skin troubles I seriously considered lasers and there is a doctor very close to where I live that I was thinking of seeing for a consultation. I am thankful to everyone who shared their story on here because I know that is not an option any more. I never realized the dangers before.

I wouldn't be surprised if my messed up hormones have to do with my apparently unusual reaction to glycolic acid. I did not realize spider veins could appear because of pregnancy, but I did know about melasma and even wondered if I had that. I don't know...I remember one day washing my face, and literally a huge spider vein appeared on my cheek right before my eyes. I ran down stairs distraught and told my husband more crap is appearing on my face. I don't know. It just sucks so bad to watch your skin deteriorate.

I do want to ask the derm if the acne is due to hormonal imbalance from pregnancy. I have never seen this one before and I hope they don't think I am crazy. My gp looked at me like I was a nut when I told him my anxiety and depression started when I got random scars, etc on my face. He probably didn't believe me because really, who gets a scar for no reason...my mom thinks I am crazy too. She keeps insisting that I am depressed because of the weather (snowy, no sun) and I keep telling her, no mom, it's my face. It's like she doesn't believe that's why I am depressed. It gets frustrating to have to keep telling her that yes, it's my face. It isn't my home life, it isn't the weather, it's the fact that I feel I have lost my confidence in the past 2 months and how down it gets me when I do my makeup and have to cover a million things and still look like crap.

I really appreciate that you did some research for me! :) I sure did gain a ton of weight and I didn't know that could contribute to spider veins. I'll tell you, pregnancy has not been nice to me. When I was pregnant with my daughter my skin was flawless...a few months after I had her the break outs started and never stopped, and then when I was pregnant with my son it got worse! I told my husband no more kids, I can't take what they do to my skin, lol. Maybe I can get some hormone tests done. Maybe they will put me on birth control or something (I have never been on it so kinda nervous about it). Hoping if I can get the break outs under control, then I could feel a bit more optimistic. I'd still rather deal with zits any day over random scars, discoloration and spider veins, though :/
Kittee
 
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by hopeful19 » Mon Jan 26, 2015 11:49 pm

I think it's a really good idea to talk it over with your doctor. Hormonal changes to your skin post pregnancy is not crazy at all. It is a completely logical question. I don't think having blood tests is a bad idea at all, as well. There is nothing to lose if they come back normal and if they don't then you can receive treatment. You might have a better response from the doctor if you initiate the conversation not making the face cream the focus, but that you were having issues with your skin post pregnancy, tried to treat it with a cream that aggravated the condition even worse, that you felt might have triggered PPD. To me, that sounds perfectly logical, honest and it's the truth. Let the weight of the conversation be more on Post Pregnancy symptoms, then the cream. Ask if tests can be done? Get the blood tests needed to rule out hormones ..thyroid etc. If the tests come back clear and it's not the case then at that time, further question the doctor regarding the cream you used. This again, is just my thoughts based on dealing with trying to get help after laser damage. When it's mentioned I have been dismissed and then not taken seriously, ending the appointment with no help. When there is an opportunity to get medical help without mentioning it, I don't..... until I feel I'm being taken seriously and the doctor is open to it. Take it or leave it, just my 2 cents.
"There's almost no risk involved," says Stephen Fanning, CEO of Solta Medical, which owns Fraxel.

The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who do evil, but rather those who sit back & let it happen.
-Einstein
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by Kittee » Wed Jan 28, 2015 6:31 pm

Yes, I will probably mostly focus on possible hormonal imbalance and skin issues that can occur post pregnancy, and will stress that my skin is very sensitive and doesn't handle topicals well. I can't even use benzoyl peroxide anymore since I had my first child. When I did, after having used it for years with no issues, it made my face red, itchy and swollen and it didn't go down for 3 days. Guess I should have known better than to use an acid on my face after that, but apparently I don't learn! I ordered some emu oil today, trying to follow electricbooms example. Other than that, still washing with plain water. I will let you know how the appointment goes tomorrow! If I can make it with the snow that we are supposed to get...Rar. Thank you so much for listening to me moan and complain, Hopeful. I gave up talking to my family about it because I am sure they are over it. :p
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by Kittee » Sun Feb 01, 2015 6:32 pm

Well, all the derm offered was....tretinoin! I honestly am way too scared to use it :( She was very nice, and did say she thought my scars would fill in over the next year, though, which gave me hope.

Also wanted to share this post I found. I was led here from a post on acne.org...there are other people like me! People who scar from weak glycolic acid. Wish I wasn't part of that very exclusive club :(
Kittee
 
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Re: I ruined my skin

PostPosted by Kittee » Sun Feb 01, 2015 6:41 pm

Accidentally posted that without the link..http://www.medhelp.org/forums/dermatolo ... 0265a.html
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