Cristeena's Story

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Cristeena's Story

PostPosted by cristeena » Sun Feb 23, 2014 12:42 pm

Hi everyone, I have been reading threads on here for the past 2 months, and now I feel ready to share my story. I hope it is ok that I am here. I have not had laser, however years ago I had several dermabrasions, 1 TCA peel, etc and I used to over-exfoliate all the time with harsh acids and products. My skin was dehydrated and unhealthy looking with large pores for a lot of my youth, but the last 5-8 years or so, I had gotten it to be smooth, poreless, and beautiful, and I had a glow. 2 months ago, I did an 18% TCA peel that ruined my life and my results mirror so much of what Ive read about and seen on here. I decided to post my story because the last few days I have been having suicidal thoughts, and I am in a very dark place and feel the need to reach out because I am scared at this point, feeling desperate, and I dont want to do anything stupid. I have been sitting in my apartment crying all weekend, not wanting to check the mail, go grocery shopping, etc. Also, I wanted to post so that if someone reads this that was considering TCA peel, hopefully they will be dissuaded after hearing about my story as I feel it will only make things worse.

Dec 26, 2013, I did an at-home TCA peel 18% to try to even skin tone a bit and lessen 1 scar. This peel has hundreds of rave reviews, so not sure why i was the unlucky one. I am 30 years ago, and I now have the skin of an elderly person. Before the peel, I was very outgoing/social and always got complimented on my skin and I felt very attractive. Today, I do not have 1 nice area of skin, but my chin and forehead are the least damaged. My entire T-zone, especially cheeks are covered in very big open pores (bigger than ive ever seen in all the pics online I have found), deep indents, slash type scars, shiny red orange peel texture, brown areas, uneven areas where more skin peeled off than others, broken caps, holes, and wrinkly rough skin that burns sometimes. When I smile, I look even older. If I breakout now, my spots take very long time to go away and leave horrid scars even if i dont touch them. My skin is so thin that I am continuing to see new indents, holes, and slashes every day, and my pores just keep getting bigger and more stretched out looking. Just this morning, I woke up to a new indent.

I have been using honey to wash and emu to moisturize but not sure if its helping. Started taking hyaluronic acid supplements, collagen supplements, and fish oil and hoping these vitamins help even just some within the next year. I feel hopeless, alone, and I get no enjoyment whatsoever out of life anymore. I wake up, go to work, and spend most of my time at work researching about how to heal. I come home and cry and go to bed. My work productivity is suffering tremendously. At first I was coping ok having read stories of women with retin-a damage who saw a lot of healing, but for every good story I read, I read 5 more stories that end badly with no healing. Recently learned retin-a damage is similar to chemical peel damage. I hope I am not offending anyone on here since I have not had thermal damage, but I feel I am experiencing similar psychological damage, and I could not find any other type of support groups for chemical burn damage. Thank you for reading, I just need to feel less alone and more hopeful, I cant keep living this way, I have shut everyone out. I wish you all more healing, xoxo.
cristeena
 
Posts: 18
Joined: Thu Feb 06, 2014 5:31 pm

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